Most people's image of marriages between Japanese and foreigners tend to focus on a couple united by love across borders. International marriages have boomed recently, the number of couples tying the knot doubling from 1987 to 1997. Spa! (5/5-12) notes that the nation's media usually presents a rosy picture of international marriages. But it adds that just as the trend to marry across borders has skyrocketed, so has the tendency to divorce. That means, for some at least, international marriages can be like hell on Earth.

"All I said was that I wanted to have a baby," says a Japanese woman, talking about the breakdown, four years ago, of her marriage to a Briton. "He said: 'I don't need a kid or a family. Let's get a divorce.' I couldn't understand it. I just cried."

But Spa! says the husband's mind was made up. The woman suspected he may have been snared by someone else, but a check revealed that wasn't the case. She says she'd hit the bottle, burst into tears and he'd comfort her, but he remained intent on ending the marriage. After their divorce, the husband got involved in one relationship after another, none leading to anything stable - a point the woman says is proof that her former husband will never grow up.

"I still don't understand why it happened," she says. "All because of one little phrase. That sort of thing would be unthinkable in Japan."

Children were also the root of the problems between a Japanese man and his former Filipina wife.

"She'd idolize me as though I was her father. She was really cute," the man says. That is until she got pregnant.

"In the middle of this huge storm, she said that she wanted to eat bananas. I told her to wait, but she got all hysterical and screamed that in the Philippines if you don't do what a pregnant woman says, the baby won't be a good kid. So I had to go the convenience store in the pouring rain three times that night."

The problems escalated after the birth of their second child.

"I told her that with my wage, we couldn't afford any more kids. But she'd say 'I'm a Catholic,' and refused to let me use a condom. I was so scared of getting her pregnant I was afraid to have sex. Then she'd start wailing that I didn't love her anymore and run off crying."

It was apparently videos that caused the breakup of one Japanese woman's marriage. Unemployed, the only enjoyment she and her Kenyan husband had was to watch rental videos. But one night, her husband went to the video store where he met someone who took him to a nightclub, treated him drinks, then drove him home. Ventures to the nightclub became more frequent. Then, he joined a rock band and further changed, the woman says.

"Clothes, shoes. He'd buy anything he liked, even if it didn't fit him. We'd go to a restaurant and he'd order everything he wanted, even though he knew he couldn't eat it all," she says.

The woman confronted her husband, but says he'd dodge the issue with reference to his favorite cartoons, saying things like "Today's Crayon Shin-Chan Day," or "Dragonball Day." The final straw for the woman came when he told her that he'd got another woman pregnant, but he wanted her to bring up the baby.